Every Kind Word

I once challenged myself for a week to say every nice thing that came into my head.  No matter if it was silly or superficial, to a close friend or to a stranger.  Even if it made for an awkward moment, where everyone stood staring…  I decided I would say aloud every single compliment, kind remark, or word of approval that I thought.

It was surprisingly difficult.  It did result in awkward moments!  I had no idea how many good things I thought, but kept to myself, until I had promised myself to give voice to them.  It was difficult at first, but quickly became easier. I have found that since that original challenge, I am much more prone to speaking the kindness in my heart and mind than I ever was before.  It is a habit I now consciously work on.

Why is it that we often hesitate to say the kind word?  Have you ever regretted saying something kind, complimentary or affirming?  By contrast, how often have you spoken in a hasty way, out of anger or hurt?  Have you regretted those words? 

I have often regretted words I have spoken in comparison, judgement or anger.  I’ve wished I could gather them back into the privacy of my mind and make the better choice of silence.  But I have never regretted a kind word!  I’ve never had a stranger or a friend become angry or defensive at a compliment I have given.  Many times a kind word has been the doorway to a longer interaction, often of greater impact and meaning than was intended at the moment of speaking the original kind word. 

There is plenty of criticism in the world already!  Why add more?

Another benefit I found to saying every kind word that came across my consciousness was how it impacted my mood and outlook.  I have heard it said, and have often repeated myself; “you will find what you are looking for”. The more you pay attention and focus on the good in others, the more you see it.  The more your mind is occupied on kindness, speaking life and blessing, the more you experience it.  The converse is unfortunately true in an equal proportion.  When we choose to focus on judgement, criticism, mistakes and disagreement, we begin to look for and find even more.  Discouragement, hopelessness and despair are contagious; but so is joy, hope and encouragement! 

Speaking kindness, love and hope feels better too!  It is just as possible to encourage yourself as it is to discourage yourself.  I believe that what we choose to focus on and what we say aloud are the two greatest factors of the level of joy in our life.

Give it a try!  Say out loud the kind things that are in your mind and heart. The deep meaningful ones and the silly, superficial ones. Spread a bit of joy to those you love, and to strangers.  See if it doesn’t increase your happiness just a bit?!